You know i cant help but feel a little foolish just starting to do this now. All the countless hours i have spent lamenting and wondering and wishing i had some way to get MY point across without any hold backs. Just be able to puke out everything that is in my twisted little mind. Blogging! Of course blogging! (sigh....stupid) I can already start seeing the challenges in being able to keep up with this and im only 4 lines in. I keep typing as my 9 month old is kicking and trying to grab her foot to tear it off, or so it appears and screams at the lack of attention on my part. My 5 year old is watching T.V while reading a book and playing with a bunch of her little toys that are sprawled out on the living room floor and is constantly complaining about being bored. Meanwhile im sitting here ignoring it all for a few minutes while enjoying my first real "meal" of the day, a nice hot bowl of Mr. Noodles. I have a sink full of dirty dishes, bottles that need to be washed and laundry to be put away.........sorry, had to take a pause to take that in and let the dizzying feeling dissipate. Where's the support you ask? Fucked if i know....probably enjoying their care free lives...(deep sigh)....i really hate people sometimes.